NOW is the time

Okay, now is the time to do some major kvetching about DC traffic. It's no longer "How do you do? Isn't the weather lovely this time of year?" It's "Hi! The fucking traffic in this fucking town makes me want to fucking fling myself off the fucking parapet."

I had a meeting in Herndon, (bleaahg.) Virginia yesterday. I live about 25 miles away from Herndon, not straight as the crow flies of course because one has to take I-270 to I-495 (the infamous "Beltway" outside of which no politician has a clue) to the Dulles Toll Road. Nightmare-one after nightmare-two after nightmare-three and which makes that parapet look so achingly tempting. Twenty-five miles away. Twenty-fucking-five miles away. My appointment was at 9:30 am. I left at 6:30 am. I arrived TWENTY FIVE MILES LATER at 9:10 am. You do the math. May all the Golden Goddesses hear my anguished prayers and lift me away on singing silken wings.

Repeat: "Abandon hope all ye who enter here."

If I could get my hands on one of those warning screen/signs above the Beltway, instead of "Expect Delays Ahead. Duh." this is indeed how it would read: "Abandon hope all ye who enter here." But, "Well," you might say, "surely the cultural advantages that Our Nation's Capitol has to offer far outweigh..." And before you could finish I would say, "Yes, that's true. The cultural advantages are grand if one has money dripping out of one's ass." Or out of a lobbyist's ass. If terrorists really want to destroy this country, the best thing they could do is leave Our Nation's Capitol intact.

Sometimes I wonder.